Chapter 6 | If You Can Stand It (1)

* * *

By the time Rienne returned with scissors, Black’s aide, Phermos had already taken care of all the necessary treatments ahead of the doctor.

Weroz, who had come in with Phermos, just watched on with an awkward face alongside Mrs. Flambard, the two of them realizing they could do little to help.

[Phermos] “So, you were shot by an arrow?”

Phermos asked the question as he carefully wrapped the cloth bandage around Black’s shoulder.

It was odd for the person who had removed the arrow, cleaned the blood, and dressed the wound with gauze and medicine to be asking that question.

[Phermos] “I mean, were you really hit by an arrow, My Lord?”

[Black] “…Quiet.”

Black completely shut Phermos down.

The realization that Phermos’ question was strange gave way to another thought.

Ah…

Rienne stood with her back straight and a pair of scissors in her hands.

He already took his clothes off.

His blood stained cape and shirt were ripped and tossed to the side on the floor. Black was sitting in front of the chair where Rienne once sat as his shoulder was being treated.

The first thing that caught her eye was how his body was riddled with scars.

There were some that were larger than others, while some were white with age and others were textured.

From top to bottom, bottom to top.

When her eyes settled on the wound that was being treated, she realized how intensely she was staring at the man’s torso.

It was a body that was more dynamic and fierce than any other one she’s seen. And it was also a contradiction.

It was a contradiction that a body filled with so many unsightly scars wasn’t in the least bit ugly to her.

In fact, it was just the opposite. Without even looking too much, she could tell he had an exceptionally beautiful structure to him.

He looked like a statue. It was as if whatever creator took great care to perfectly sculpt him so that none of his wounds would ever take away from how flawless he was.

[Black] “Don’t just stand there. Sit.”

As Rienne observed him, Black turned and faced her.

He was also noticing things about her, like how pale her skin was after seeing his wound or how deep her emerald eyes were.

[Black] “You look like you’re going to faint.”

[Rienne] “…I’m fine.”

Rienne was fortunate there were others around. If it were just the two of them, she wouldn’t be able to cleanly hide how unsettled she was.

[Rienne] “How bad is Lord Tiwakan’s injury?”

Rienne turned to ask Phermos.

[Phermos] “It’s not life-threatening, but it’s no small matter either. It won’t immobilize him, but he will suffer for a time. He’ll likely get a fever and struggle to sleep at night. If the arrow was poisoned, then we may have to anticipate things worsening.”

The word ‘poison’ completely changed the air in the room.

Weroz spoke up, his voice filled with resentment.

[Weroz] “I have Castle Nauk’s guards working to track down the attacker. Even if the arrow turned out to be poisoned, we should have no trouble procuring an antidote.”

[Phermos] “Even if the attacker is caught, isn’t the person who sent them the bigger issue?”

The barbarians never beat around the bush with their words.

[Phermos] “We would hate to think this is Nauk’s way of showing their courtesy now that both sides have committed to the agreement.”

[Weroz] “How dare you! Do you really think of us to be the sort of people to do such a thing?”

Weroz was such an honest knight, he immediately took insult.

[Rienne] “Sir Weroz.”

Rienne stopped him.

[Rienne] “Calm yourself. We are the ones who haven’t shown our faith properly.”

[Weroz] “Princess!”

[Rienne] “And we cannot deny that the arrow originated in Nauk.”

[Weroz] “I…”

Weroz bit his lip.

The attack occurred in the back garden of the castle, not out in the middle of nowhere, and it was certain that the arrow belonged to someone of Nauk. If the circumstances were reversed, Weroz wouldn’t be able to hide his suspicion.

[Rienne] “It’s possible there are people in Nauk who may oppose this marriage, but in no way do they represent our official stance.”

That was the honest truth. Rienne prayed Black would see that.

[Rienne] “In the meantime, while you’re here in Nauk, we will do everything we can to alleviate the concerns of the Tiwakan. We do not want this marriage fall through and return to war. We only wish for peace.”

[Phermos] “And what say you, My Lord?”

Phermos turned to Black and asked him.

[Phermos] “Do you wish for the same as the Princess of Nauk?”

The future of Nauk was entirely dependent on Black’s answer.

It was funny how suddenly Rienne was in a position where she wanted this marriage to happen, rather than staunching trying to escape it.

[Black] “…My desires haven’t changed.”

The moment Black spoke, Rienne felt a wave of relief wash over her.

She couldn’t believe it. The source of all of these feelings was such a contradictory man. It was still the same day that her lover’s body had been returned to her, but she couldn’t even begin to think about that.

[Phermos] “Well, then.”

Phermos looked down, an odd clicking noise coming from the strange looking glasses on his face.

[Phermos] “At least now we’re certain there’s a faction in Nauk that’s still fighting against Tiwakan. Best we sort it out before the day of the wedding.”

No one disagreed.

[Rienne] “Nauk is with you.”

[Phermos] “Good to hear. I should mention that the Tiwakan Mercenaries wish to be the ones to investigate this matter further. Ah, but please do not misunderstand. We don’t wish to usurp the castle guards’ job. It’s just that the Tiwakan is now considered the Guardians of Arsak. As such, we are obligated to handle the attempt on Lord Tiwakan’s life, seeing as he is now a part of the family.”

[Weroz] “That’s…”

Weroz looked between Rienne and Maslow.

If they were to refuse the request, it would only serve to make them look more suspicious, as if they were trying to cover things up behind the scenes. Rienne had already made her decision like a ship leaving port.

[Rienne] “I will allow it.”

Everything they had declared on their marriage pledge seemed to be going smoothly. Everything except the marriage itself.

* * *

Just as they anticipated, his fever rose.

It was evening by the time Black lost consciousness and fell asleep. Every so often, he’d wake up and groan in pain, causing Rienne and Mrs. Flambard to go and check on him.

[Mrs. Flambard] “I think he’s finally asleep. You should get some rest too, Princess.”

Rienne looked down at Black, who couldn’t even see her.

[Rienne] “I don’t think he’s asleep… His eyelids are moving.”

[Mrs. Flambard] “That doesn’t mean he’s conscious.”

[Rienne] “We need to show our sincerity to one another. We can’t risk seeming uncaring.”

Rienne pulled out a new towel and offered it to Mrs. Flambard.

[Rienne] “Please, use this to wipe off his sweat.”

[Mrs. Flambard] “. . .”

Mrs. Flambard took it with tears in her eye.

[Mrs. Flambard] “Oh, Princess… why would you marry a man you do not wish to touch? What are you going to do?”

Rienne shook her head.

[Rienne] “Quiet, ma’am. We aren’t the only ones here. Tiwakan has eyes and ears just outside the door.”

After Rienne said that, Mrs. Flambard realized her mistake and quickly covered her mouth. Just then, Rienne took the towel back from her.

[Rienne] “And it’s not that I can’t touch him. Give the towel to me. I’ll do it myself.”

…It’s true that I dislike it, though.

She felt uncomfortable touching this man. But it was different from how Mrs. Flambard described it.

It wasn’t that she hated him or found him disgusting.

It was just…

What did I dislike about it?

Rienne felt such conflicting feelings bubbling up inside her as she wiped off the sweat on Black’s forehead.

I don’t hate it, and yet I hate it.

I hate it, and yet I don’t hate it.

She couldn’t figure out these feelings inside of her.

[Mrs. Flambard] “I’ll go change the water then, Princess.”

Perhaps embarrassed by her earlier blunder, Mrs. Flambard quickly found something to do as an excuse to leave the room.

The room they were in was the bedroom Rienne had used when King Seon was still alive. Back then, she thought the bed was pointlessly large for how small she was, but now it looked cramped and tiny with Black in it.

[Rienne] “Once he’s awake, I’ll find a different room for him.”

It was in that moment when Rienne muttered to herself and moved to wipe the sweat off the back of Black’s neck that he suddenly spoke.

[Black] “…This room is fine.”

[Rienne] “…!”

Rienne dropped the towel in surprise. Black’s light blue eyes were staring straight at her.

[Rienne] “I see… You’re awake.”

How long has he been awake?

How much did he hear?

[Black] “I heard you say you were capable of touching me.”

[Rienne] “. . .”

Rienne gripped the hem of her skirt.

She stared down at the towel she had dropped directly on his injured shoulder. She had no choice but to get closer to him to retrieve it.

[Rienne] “I just need more time. My lover was the only person I was comfortable being with, while you, Lord Tiwakan, are still a stranger to me.”

[Black] “But not to me.”

…Excuse me?

[Black] “You are no stranger to me, Princess.”

His words were so low and breathy, they sounded more like sighs.

[Black] “If you can tolerate touching me, then how much is acceptable?”

[Rienne] “…Huh?”

The look in Black’s eyes made his intentions clear. They slowly and meticulously looked over Rienne’s face.

[Black] “Maybe it’s because of the fever, but there’s something I’d like to check.”

[Rienne] “What do you mean…?”

[Black] “I’m just asking. I want to see if you hate it.”

Black reached out his hand, his skin warm from his fever. It got closer and closer until it eventually settled on Rienne’s cheek.

[Black] “Is this much alright?”

[Rienne] “Lord Tiwakan, I…”

[Black] “Answer me, Princess.”

…I don’t know what to say.

Why was she letting him touch her face and not pushing him away?

[Black] “Is this alright?”

[Rienne] “. . .”

She didn’t know. Everything was just so warm. It must’ve been because his temperature was so high. Even his eyes which were normally as clear as spring water were cloudy from the heat.

He looked so feverish, it felt like it would pass on to her.

[Rienne] “Your fever is very high, my lord.”

Rienne shook her head to escape his touch.

[Rienne] “You should close your eyes and get some rest. If it gets difficult, I have some painkillers I can give you.”

[Black] “…My fever’s high…”

She couldn’t tell if he was talking to her, talking to himself, or was just delirious from the fever.

[Black] “Then I’ll try this.”

Before Rienne even realized it, he was sitting upright, placing his fevered hand on her lips. Rubbing her lower lip slightly with his thumb, Black asked her a question.

[Black] “Is this tolerable?”

He definitely had a fever.

The way he was touching her was different from those in their right mind, but it also was different from the touch of her old love.

It was so hot, she couldn’t ignore it.

[Black] “Do you hate this?”

His thumb, which was once rubbing her lip, traveled down until it met her chin. He gently swept his fingers across her jaw before touching her neck.

His warm hands gently brushed against her skin and at some point started to caress her. Never mind her eyes—Rienne’s whole body was trembling.

The man’s hands were warm likely due to his fever, but it filled her with a burning sensation. It was a heat she had never felt with her previous lover.

I can’t take this anymore.

She felt like she would be lying to herself if she kept this up.

Believing that she wanted this man.

[Rienne] “Enough.”

With her eyes still closed, Rienne pushed against Black’s hand to stop him.

She was afraid. Not because he had his hand wrapped around her neck, but because that very hand was just too hot.

[Rienne] “Is this… what you wanted me to endure?”

Rienne pulled herself together enough to look at Black’s fever filled eyes.

[Rienne] “What were you…?”

[Black] “I don’t know.”

His answer was just as hazy as he was.

Holding Rienne’s hand, Black looked down at it as he slowly moved his tongue around.

[Black] “What was I going to do?”

[Rienne] “You…”

[Black] “I guess I was just curious how you would treat me, Princess.”

Black slowly pulled Rienne’s hand closer to him, pressing his lips against it and giving it a kiss for whatever reason.

[Black] “Or maybe I just wanted to touch you.”

[Rienne] “. . .”

[Black] “Is the reason really important?”

[Rienne] “…Yes.”

Rienne was adamant with her answer.

[Rienne] “This isn’t a normal engagement. Because you asked Nauk for this marriage, Lord Tiwakan, I was forced to part ways with my love. And I’m with child.”

As she quickly added those final words, her voice shook.

Of course it would. Lying so blatantly was never easy.

[Rienne] “In these circumstances, do you really expect me to so readily show you affection, as if this was something we promised together?”

[Black] “…Like I said, I don’t know what I should do now.”

Normally his eyes were like those of a beast, but now he just looked dazed from the fever.

It seemed like he was honest when he said he didn’t know.

[Black] “All I know was that I didn’t want someone else to take you away.”