I hadn’t been inside Bai Ye’s bedroom before. I imagined it would smell of cedar just like him, but when he brought me over the threshold, there was only a whiff of fresh herbs drifting in the air.

It was the taste of his kiss. I inhaled deeply, letting it fill my nostrils and suffuse all my senses.

He noticed, “Next time I’ll add some wormwood and sweet fennel …”

I gaped at him, my sentiments towards the scent completely different now. Wormwood and sweet fennel were the ingredients for … a strong aphrodisiac …

He laughed as he lowered us both into the bed. “Still beautiful when you blush,” he kissed me and whispered.

I hated how easy it was for him to make me blush. But at the same time, I loved this hidden side of him that wasn’t all seriousness, that was so good at teasing me and so unpredictably wild.

As he deepened the kiss, his hands wasted no time gliding over the flaps of my dress and working the remaining knots and ties. I was already disheveled, and with only a few tugs and pulls, the last layer of my clothes fell off my shoulders.

My heart thudded in my ears. The curtains were closed, and the room was much dimmer than the garden, though still bright enough to see. It was the first time that I faced him with my bare body in full light, and I was too nervous and afraid to see his reaction to all my imperfections.

“Qing-er,” he whispered as his hands followed the curves of my waist down to my hips, slid over to my bottoms, and then back to my thighs. “You are most beautiful when I can see you … all of you.”

I opened my squeezed-shut eyes and looked at him, panting slightly from his caress. He wasn’t disappointed?

“Hmm, I take that back,” he said, and I tensed. “Most beautiful when you look at me like this … Innocently seductive,” he smirked.

“Bai Ye!” I yanked him by the collar. He could always find the best way to get a good laugh out of me. But the moment his collar opened loose under my grip, the glimpse of his scar doused all my little fires of indignation.

It might be the thought of his injuries that worried me, or it might be his approval at the sight of my body that encouraged me; all I knew was that the next thing I said was not something I would’ve ever expected of myself: “Let me see the rest of you.”

His eyes widened. Then a trace of delight surfaced in their depths. “I’m honored,” he opened his arms.

I sat up, undid his sash, and slid off his robe and undershirts. No more scars—I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. He looked perfect everywhere else, with his tight muscles even more obvious in the brightness of the day, and his skin shone a healthy golden hue in the diffused light. I ran my hands down his broad shoulders and chest, his smooth back, his hard abdomen. He closed his eyes, and his breaths quickened.

I ignored my burning cheeks and slid my hands down to his waist.

It took me a few clumsy tries to successfully clear his breeches off his ridge. I looked, and I gasped. Not that the sight was as astonishing as his scars, but I hadn’t expected it to be … a bit scary in its own way. So red, and so big.

How could such a thing fit … inside me?

He chucked at my stupefaction. “Like what you see?” He lowered me back onto the pillow with a kiss.

I embraced him. My face couldn’t burn hotter, but when our bare bodies pressed tight together, I felt something changing between us, as if revealing ourselves to each other, unprotected and undisguised, had peeled off that last layer of shield between us and brought us closer. It was finally him—only him—that I was holding in my arms.

“Bai Ye,” I breathed into his lips, “I like seeing you. All of you.” I paused and rephrased myself, “I like all of you. I … I love you.”

I wasn’t sure why I said it, but at that moment, I suddenly felt an urge to tell him the deepest secret in my heart, to let all my guards down and finally acknowledge my true feelings, both to him and to myself.

He stilled, as if the confession shocked him. “Qing-er,” he said after a while. “I …”

My heart pounded for the rest of the words, but he cut it off with a peck on my lips. Then he moved down, trailing wet kisses along my neck, chest, stomach, belly …

He didn’t stop.

“Bai Ye?” I lifted my head and looked down at him. He spread my thighs open and pressed his mouth onto my …

“Bai … Ah! …” It was too late when I realized what he was doing. I almost screamed to stop him, but a sharp, sweeping wave of pleasure crashed over me the moment he touched me, and my words shattered. The sensation came so suddenly, so overwhelmingly that even my pitch changed.

How … How could he bring himself to do this?

All my muscles tightened, and I dug my fingers deep into his hair. I wanted to stop him, and I fought the tremor in my voice to try to speak, but all that came out were broken syllables and moans: “Bai Ye … ah … d-don’t … um … ah …”

I couldn’t bear the image of him buried between my legs, lowering himself like so to please me. But I also couldn’t pretend that I didn’t want it. Every stroke of his tongue, every slight swirl and suckle engulfed my senses with wild pleasure, and I couldn’t control the shake of my whole body or hold back the squeals escaping my throat.

“S-stop … Bai Ye … Ahh!” When the sensation finally overcame me, my body spasmed so hard that my back arched, and the world spun. I probably screamed. I was beyond euphoric—for the release, and for what he did for me to bring such rapture.

I held his cheeks with my trembling hands and brought his face against mine. His lips glistened from my climax, and I kissed him, panting violently as I tasted the slight saltiness of myself on the tip of his tongue.

“Qing-er …” he whispered as he tightened his arm around my nape and slid between my shaky thighs, though he still didn’t finish those words. He didn’t need to. There was raw emotion in the way he held me and claimed me, as if he wanted to make me part of him, as if something deep inside him was finally unleashed after being buried for too long.

He loved me. I knew at last.

I gave him everything I had until the next wave of pleasure consumed us both.