Mo Roulan didn’t know how she stopped a taxi and got inside. She just sat dumbly on the back seat and trying to stop her fingers from trembling. When the taxi driver asked her the address of her home, it took her a few seconds for her to mumble it in a low voice. Her head was lowered as she looked down at her lap on her blankly. Her body kept shivering as she relived that night again and again. The night she died. The night her child died. It was strange how each and every moment was etched in her memory.
Why is it so difficult to forget the most painful moments of our life? If one could forget them, would it not make Life easy?
The taxi driver also found something strange about the person sitting in the back seat as he looked through the rearview mirror but he didn’t say anything to her.
Soon the taxi reached the entrance of Mo Roulan’s home and the driver told her. She raised her head abruptly and the taxi driver looked startled at her disheveled form.
Mo Roulan fumbled inside her purse and she handed him money without even counting.
The taxi driver was a kind man and felt sympathy for the girl. So he didn’t argue with her even though the money was less.
It was already night so there was no one in the streets. When Mo Roulan finally reached the door of her home, she opened the door with the extra key inside her purse instead of knocking on the door. The living room was dark. Stepping inside her house, she ran to her room.
Inside her room, Mo Roulan looked at herself in the mirror. Her eyes were red filled with unshed tears. Her lips were trembling.
At some moment, a tear fell from her eye. Mo Roulan was startled and she wiped it hurriedly. But she wiped one, the second fell, and then the more followed it.
She wiped them until her face turned red.
No, she can’t cry. She had promised herself that she will never cry for him again. Why is it so difficult to keep just one promise?
She could not stop her tears, no matter how hard she tried. So she cried at her helplessness. She sobbed remembering those painful memories. Her heart was in enormous pain.
Fate sure chose the cruelest way to put him in front of her. She met him when that woman was there with him. Was not it a sign to show her that she should stay away from him? That she would never get any place in his life.
Lin Qianru who was standing outside the door heard her daughter’s sobs. She was shocked. She was waiting for Roulan in the living room but she accidentally slept and just woke up hearing the noise when Mo Roulan opened the door. Before she could ask her daughter how was the party, her daughter ran inside and what fell in her ears was her sobs.
Her own eyes were filled with tears as she kept standing outside the door and hearing her muffled sobs. What happened? Did someone bully her daughter at the party? Knowing her daughter, she would never tell her about this.
For the first time since they had moved, she suddenly regretted bringing Mo Roulan to the City H.
Now she just felt afraid. Will her decision snatch her daughter’s happiness from her?
————-
Standing outside the bar, Shen Youlin stared at its entrance for a few seconds as the loud sound of slap continued buzzing in her ears. And she finally stepped inside the bar.
Without even looking around, she knew where was the person she wanted to find. So she passed the front hall where everyone was dancing and went inside a private room.
There in the room sat a group of girls. Some were kissing while others were making out inside the room. Some absentmindedly were drinking whatever was in their hand and some were laughing foolishly. A few raised their head when they heard the door being opened and continued whatever they were doing on seeing that it was her.
Only You Youxin continued looking at Shen Youlin as she walked further inside the room and sat on the couch. A second after, she smiled brilliantly at Shen Youlin as she got up and walked towards her. Bending down to her face level, she whispered in her ear.
“Oh babe, you finally remembered me after being thrown aside by them.”
Shen Youlin didn’t say anything. Her face was free of any emotion but You Youxin didn’t feel discouraged and continued
“So how would you like to take it today?”
A table placed in the center of the room was filled with pills, injections, and some small powder packets. Ignoring You Youxin, Shen Youlin stood up from the couch and walked towards the table. Her breathe unconsciously fastened as she neared it. But before she could pick something from the table, she was suddenly pulled back.
Wrapping Shen Youlin’s hand, that she had forwarded towards the table, behind her back, You Youxin tightly held her and spoke in a low voice.
“Not like this, my dear Linlin. You have to pay something first.”
Saying this, You Youxin kissed her shoulder and was about to proceed to her neck when Shen Youlin kicked her with her elbow and got free from her hold.
She picked her purse that had fallen on the floor and threw a bundle of cash on You Youxin’s face who smiled coldly at her actions.
After this, Shen Youlin turned around and picked pills, injections, and a few packets from the table. She swallowed a bunch of pills and threw the rest of the things inside her purse. Then she stepped out of the room without looking back.
That night she danced on the stage of the bar as if she was the only person in the whole bar. Her mind was oblivious to how her feet were moving.
She just knew she does not want to feel alone. She does not want to go inside the darkness of that house again.
So let her be oblivious to everything for this night.
Let her feel this happiness even if the joy of it was a mere illusion.