During the night, I have a weird dream. It’s one of those where I see myself from outside, and this time I’m not even that disoriented.
It’s not the first time it happens, so I’m getting used to it.
«It has been such a long meeting,» I sigh. «This Queen just wants to forget about state affairs for an evening…»
I throw myself on the bed, while the person looking at me walks to it.
«I’m at my Queen’s service,» this person mutters, and they reach out for my fingers. My hand is cold but soft, and I can see traces of ink under my nails.
I must have been working for the whole day, scribbling and signing a mountain of papers.
Oh, I miss my job so much!
«Would you like to see something amusing?» I inquire while sitting up and smiling brightly. «Today the city is celebrating the Day of the Moon. You’ll like it!»
«There’s no visit to the city in your schedule, my Queen…» this person says with worry. His voice is normal, but I can feel his emotions as they were mine.
«No, but who can prohibit me?» I shrug.
I run to the wardrobe and search for a simple dark gown, and I throw a mantle to this person.
«You better cover your face, or we would attract too much attention,» I continue, still searching for clothes.
«Am I that hideous?»
Theodora, the Queen of Polis, stops her rummaging and turns to this person with a confused look. That sagacious ruler smiles charmingly and answers with a sentence I couldn’t imagine flow out of my mouth.
«You’re the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. It would be a pity to share you with someone else…»
Then, with a wily expression, I walk to the bed and start changing clothes in front of this person, not bothered by his close watch.
And I can tell it’s a very close watch: this person notices every detail of my body, even some I didn’t know about.
I wouldn’t let anyone look at me this attentively. Even more, if I was in my own room, ruling my city!
Who the hell is this man?
«If you behave, I’ll let you play with this Queen to your heart’s content,» I voice once I’ve done changing. I start braiding my hair while this person is suddenly willing to follow me in the city.
I know, because I feel what’s in their heart. It’s like a bunch of butterflies are storming in the stomach, and the lungs are full of air and contentedness. Have I ever felt like this, in my life?
I don’t remember any occasion when my heart was beating so happily.
I wake up at dawn, as I’ve done for the last ten years. However, this time, I don’t do it on my own.
The clock on the wall starts donging, and I startle in bed and get up in a sitting position on alert. I look around, searching for the source of the sound.
I sigh, relieved that it was just Alexander’s alarm.
I lie back in bed and settle under the covers when his arms grab me all of a sudden.
«What are you doing now?» I ask, more startled than annoyed.
He drags me closer without a word and kisses my temple delicately.
«Good morning,» he whispers and leans his head on my shoulder.
«Shouldn’t we get up?» I ask, noticing how he closed his eyes.
«You can stay in bed some more time. I’ll go, but you’re not required to attend for the whole day…»
«Then, why aren’t you getting up?»
«Because it’s too early.»
«You set the alarm by yourself, didn’t you?»
«That’s correct,» he nods against my shoulder.
«What time do you need to get up?»
«Wife, don’t bother,» he voices and tightens his clench around my waist.
I close my mouth, annoyed, and I lie in bed helplessly until the alarm sounds for the second time.
«Alexander, why two alarms?» I inquire. He already predicted he wouldn’t get up, didn’t he?
«Because I wanted to cuddle with my wife.»
«And you set not one, but two alarms for that?»
«You’ve discovered me,» he chuckles.
«You’ll have that thing out of here by the end of the day,» I state, and I try to get up. However, his arms prevent me from carrying out my intention.
«But I need my alarm, dear wife. That is if you don’t take onto yourself to wake me up every single day.»
«You can dream of that. I’m the Duchess of Kyre. What makes you think I’ll be your personal alarm?»
«The fact that I am the Duke of Kyre.»
Well, that’s enough of a reason, isn’t it?
I remember that dream all of a sudden. My words and actions were so surprising that I don’t believe that was something like that could really happen. However, there must be a reason if I dreamt of such a thing.
Is it my subconscious telling me what I desire?
I observe Alexander while he gets ready for the day.
Is being naughty and insolent what I really want? Should I at least try being more assertive? If it doesn’t work, I can just go back to my clumsy routine.
I get up from the bed and run to my Duke.
I pull his sleeve and lean on his chest. Then, I peck his cheek and observe his reaction.
«What is this for?» he inquires, evidently suspicious.
«You’ll have to work hard today, so I was thinking of offering you some more motivation,» I whisper, tilting my head seductively.
Needless to say, my Duke doesn’t bat an eye. He’s more curious than intrigued. Is it because I’m not good enough?
I peck him again, and I move towards his mouth a millimetre at a time. I press my lips a bit longer when I reach the corner of his mouth, and he surrounds my waist with an arm.
«What kind of motivation?» he asks, now listening attentively.
He’s interested!
«If you behave, you’ll have this Duchess at… at…» I start, but then my cheeks blush and my tongue trembles. My mind breaks for a couple of seconds, and I find myself staring at Alexander with a stupid expression.
«My Duchess what?» he presses me.
I crook my mouth, realising that I won’t be able to finish the sentence.
«I will praise you until you’re too tired of hearing me,» I say when I can think again.
«Hmm, that would mean listening to you for eternity.»
Why couldn’t I say just a few words? It’s not like the situation would change much. I already am at the Duke’s disposal. I haven’t ever rejected him, and he perceives it.
Saying it out loud wouldn’t have changed a thing, literally. It would have made the Duke more content, at most.
I drop my shoulders and look down, displeased by my own lack of firmness. Still, in the dream, I said those words so effortlessly. As if I was used to looking so relaxed while offering myself to that person.
Maybe, the mistake was to try immediately with the hard part.
I should make small steps until I get used to being naughty. Then, when the Duke isn’t surprised by my behaviour anymore, I’ll try again.
For now, I’ve already got out of my way just to peck his cheek. It’s more than enough for now. Not to mention that I need to prepare, as well.
«I’ll reach you soon after breakfast. I’ll work in the Lady’s study in the meantime,» I inform my husband.
«I’ll wait for you,» he says, letting me go. «Don’t get too focused on your work and forget of me.»
Uh, as if! There isn’t enough work to make me focus so much.
I will probably have finished half of the tasks by the time I go to him.
«Also, I can give you some praise as well if you help me solve Kyre’s matters…» Alexander continues, smiling wily and cunning.
«I don’t need praise,» I stop him, and his grin widens.
«I’ll give you anything you desire,» he whispers.
«Acknowledgement. If I do well, will you let me help administer Kyre? I’ll be your best aide if I prove myself worthy.»
«Deal,» he nods. «Let’s show them how skilful the new Lady is.»
I don’t think that solving a couple of problems will help my reputation improve, but it’s a way to start understanding how things work around here. This is where I’ll pass the rest of my life, it’s better if I get a few sympathisers.
«I’m also curious to see how my Duke is while working,» I add, tilting my head. «I’ve never seen you actually commit to anything.»
Contrarily to the way he reacted a few seconds ago, this time he smiles happily. After all, he can read my mind. He knew I wasn’t a hundred per cent sincere, then.
«I’m also looking forward to the show,» he exclaims.
I have no clue about what he’s hoping to see, but I just smile back at his enthusiasm.