Dysfunctional - An Assassin's Guide to Reincarnating in Another World Novel

Chapter 2 - 1 - Three, Two, One


What’s the most anticlimactic moment of your life? Mine was the start of my second life.

Remember how excited I had been to reincarnate in a fantasy world?

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Yeah, I had been living in this world for two months now, and it’s been, well, anticlimactic.

First of all, not-God dropped me here with no money or even a place to stay, which meant I had to work a bunch of low paying part time jobs just to be able to rent out a room at an inn and buy food.

Secondly, and this was maybe kinda my own fault for overlooking it, this world had no digital entertainment, so my old hobbies of gaming and watching anime were impossible here.

Electricity wasn’t a thing here, which meant no air conditioning or fluorescent lights.

Instead, there were oil lamps and mechanical fans that you had to wind up by hand for about ten minutes, and then it would spin for about an hour before needing to be winded up again. There were other options for light and cooling, but they were way too expensive for me to even consider.

Thankfully, along with mechanics, plumbing existed in this world, so the toilets weren’t too much worse from my old world.

Oh, and third, not-God had dropped me in the weakest country in this world. In fact, he had dropped me right OUTSIDE it, forcing me to wait till nightfall and scale up the walls to sneak into the country. Thankfully, I’d been dropped here with clothes on my body, sneaking into a country naked would have been…not good.

And by weakest, I mean that it had the weakest Adventurers on average, as well as the least profitable overall surrounding available resources, meaning the country was economically less developed than the others, and the results of those factors are that none of the other countries bothered forming alliances with the country I’m in.

If any of them felt like invading and taking over this place, they’d be able to do so with relatively minimal effort. From strongest to weakest, the five countries were called Platinberg, Goldway, Silvland, Bronztan and finally, where I was, the Rustlands. Yeah, literally Platinum, Gold, Silver, Bronze and Rust. And I was in Rust.

The only reason this country still had its independence was probably because the other countries had figured that the lower value resources surrounding it weren’t worth taking the trouble to invade it.

I learnt all that within the first two days of coming here. Maybe I should have been a bit more specific when I asked for a world that wasn’t boring.

So, in order to distract myself from all that overwhelming negative, I decided to sneak out of the country walls to test out my new magic and fighting abilities, although I couldn’t afford a proper weapon at the time, so I just borrowed a kitchen knife from one of the part-time jobs I’d been working.

I had to wait till night to sneak out since I didn’t want to be seen, and I didn’t know the country well enough yet to know where I’d be able to practice in peace within the walls.

After sneaking out, I came across a rocky area with a large cave entrance and a long road leading away from the country.

I had a bit of fun as I cut down some small, green monsters that I assumed were Goblins, and it took me a while to get the hang of my Lightning Magic, but once I did, boy did I have a blast electrocuting those suckers.

After three years of getting zapped, it sure felt good to be the one doing the zapping!

Unfortunately, I was enjoying myself so much that I kinda went overboard and used up all my Mana, which is what you call magical energy in this world. It fully restores itself after a few hours, but if you use it all up, it’ll feel like you’re completely out of stamina until a bit of Mana is replenished.

As a result, I was nearly torn apart by the monsters as my body was suddenly hit by a wave of fatigue and struggled to move, I somehow managed to get back to the walls purely on adrenaline, and then just barely managed to sneak back in.

My Healing Factor was working at a snails’ pace until I had gotten back some of my Mana, so for a while there I was sort of stuck with some of my organs exposed. After I replenished enough Mana for the Healing Factor to work properly, all my injuries healed up, but it turns out that continuous use of it has a pretty annoying drawback.

The Healing Factor doesn’t consume a lot of Mana, but it does eat up a ton of stamina. As an assassin, my fighting style was to minimize wasteful movements, stay calm, and keep an eye out for openings in my opponent.

Not that I had to do a lot of fighting back in my old life, the majority of my assassinations ended in a single strike from a sneak attack. My point is, for a fighting style that requires minimalistic and accurate movements, suddenly losing a large chunk of stamina can feel incredibly disconcerting.

After that, I kept sneaking out every so often to get my body more accustomed to using magic, as well as to get a feel for how much Mana my Lightning Magic consumes and how long it takes to replenish. I hadn’t quite figured all of it out yet, but I was able to at least sense when I was starting to run low on Mana.

Anyway, back to the present.

Two months had passed, and today, I was about to start my first day of school.

Thankfully, applying to enroll in the Adventurer Academy was free, you just had to pass the entrance exam on the first day for them to accept your application.

I had gone there a couple of weeks ago and filled out the application form, I left my name as just Kuro, with no last name. The guy who took my form after I filled it out didn’t say a word, so I assumed it was fine.

All he said was that it won’t be a written test, so I assumed it was probably a test of magic or combat. After all, this may be a fantasy-like world where magic was normal, but there were still quite a few people who had low or almost non-existent magical potential.

I had managed to save up enough money to get myself some gear and weapons, finally able to stop using the kitchen knife that had grown incredibly blunt.

Back in my old world, I never enjoyed using guns or sniping my targets, my weapons of choice were a short-sword and dagger, I enjoyed sneaking up on my targets and taking them out with a single slash or stab.

Finally, I no longer had to use my borrowed…okay fine, stolen kitchen knife. To be fair, I had meant to return it, but it was noticeably worn out after I’d been using it for all these weeks.

I looked at myself in the stained, dusty mirror in my room bathroom at the inn. My appearance was different to my previous life, although my build was the same.

Average height, a strong build without being too muscular, since I prioritized agility and speed over raw strength. I had dark blue eyes, slightly thick black eyebrows and a light tan complexion. My black, semi-translucent hair was a bit more than medium length, the front was long enough be just past my right eyebrow, while the left side was tucked behind my left ear.

My gear was all black, same as in my last life. My top was a sleeveless black combat vest that was pretty durable, yet easy to move in. I had flexible yet sturdy arm guards went past my forearms.

While my shoulders were exposed, it did make it easier to move my arms.

My trousers were of a similar material to my arm guards, they were strong, but didn’t restrict my movements. As for my shoes, I just got a light pair.

Black, of course.

Vertically over my right shoulder was my short-sword, strapped to my back, while my dagger was was placed horizontally on my lower back, with the handle pointing to the left. I was naturally right handed, so I needed my main weapon to the right and my secondary weapon to the left.

The blade of the short-sword was about the length of my forearm, while the dagger was about half of that. I also had a bunch of needles, wire and throwing knives hidden throughout my outfit and arm guards.

Alright then, time to head out.

The inn I was staying at was pretty close to the Academy, so it didn’t take too long for me to get there.

When I applied to the Academy, the guy who took my application gave me a small crystal that served as proof that I was a valid applicant. I presented it to the guard at the entrance, he glanced at it and nodded, letting me in.

I was led to a large hall, where a bunch of other people around my age were gathered.

Probably the other applicants.

A few more people entered the room after me, and about half an hour later, the doors were suddenly shut and locked. After a moment of silence, everyone around me began to murmur uneasily, unsure of what to expect.

“Silence!” Boomed a deep voice, from the front of the room.

In an instant, everyone stopped talking and shifted their attention.

How long had he been there? I hadn’t noticed him at all.

A man who looked to be in his early thirties stood in front of us.

He had longish, messy black hair and a short beard, his eyes looked sharp like a reptile, the tips of his fingers looked more like claws than fingernails, and the back of his hands appeared to be scaly. Some type of lizard Anima?

“My name is Liga Dile, and I’m your exam administrator, you may call me Admin Dile. Your entrance exam is quite simple. There appear to be around eighty applicants here today, you shall each fight me. To pass, you need to either land a solid attack on me or simply last one minute against me one-on-one. You may use any weapons you like, magic is fine too. I’ll be fighting bare handed, and I won’t use my Elemental Magic. I’ll be picking you at random, so be ready to start at any given moment. Let’s see, first up…you,” He said, pointing at a guy holding a spear, “Everyone else, stand back.”

It took a second for everything he said to sink in. All the applicants then silently headed for the back of the hall, until the spear guy stood alone, unable to hide his apparent nervousness.

“I feel bad for that guy, going first in a test like this puts you at a huge disadvantage.”

“True, but it gives the rest of us a chance to see what we’re up against.”

Everyone began whispering, as the administrator began counting down the start of the first exam. The applicant took a deep breath and got into his stance, gripping his spear tightly.

“Three, two, one.”

As soon as he finished counting down, Admin Dile dashed forward towards spear guy at an impressive speed. Spear guy began to react, but he was far too late. Before he could even raise his weapon, Dile had reached him, his claws stopped just short of the applicant’s throat.

“You fail. Next up is…you.”

Before poor spear guy could even wrap his head around his defeat, the next applicant had been picked.

It didn’t take long before fifty applicants had taken the exam. Of them, only fourteen had managed to survive a whole minute, and all of them had been on the defensive, a few had managed to put up fairly decent fights, but it was clear how much Admin Dile was holding back.

The majority of applicants failed within the first few seconds, just like the first guy. No one had managed to pass the exam by landing an attack on him. More of the same continued, until the sixty-seventh applicant. At that point, only sixteen people had passed.

“Alright, let’s do this. Heh, this should be fun!”

A guy with blonde hair, green eyes and an enthusiastic grin walked up, carrying a sickle attached to a chain. He also had a bushy tail with a ring pattern. It didn’t quite look like a raccoon tail, so maybe a ring tailed lemur Anima?

At any rate, I was intrigued by his choice of weapon, how did he plan to use it?

“Three, two, one.”

Just like all the previous fights, the exam administrator dashed forward towards the applicant, but this time he was forced to stop halfway, as a blade whizzed just in front of his face. The instant the countdown ended, blondie swung his chain so that the arc of the sickle would slice across where Dile was about to run through. However, he managed to stop in his tracks in time to avoid the blade, and now blondie was wide open.

He yanked the chain back, but Dile would get to him faster than he could get his blade back, and his hands weren’t in the right position to be able to properly defend himself. However, right as the administrator was about to reach him, he smiled.

In an instant, he discharged a bolt of lightning from his mouth, aimed at the head of his opponent. Dile was quick to react and try to dodge, but wasn’t able to fully avoid it, his shoulder taking quite a hit, forcing a groan of pain out of him.

Meanwhile, the sickle was back in blondie’s hand, and he dashed towards Dile, streaming lightning through the chain and sickle. He raised the sickle as he neared him, aiming to strike him with the back of the blade. Before he could strike, the ground beneath him rose up and grabbed onto his legs and arms, restricting his movements.

Wait, what just happened?

“…you forced me to use my Elemental magic, quite impressive. You pass.”

Dile undid the magic, letting blondie go and returning the floor to the way it was before. All the other applicants looked stunned after that last battle, but all I felt was excitement.

“Hey, that sure was exhilarating!” Blondie exclaimed triumphantly.

Man, some of the applicants who had already passed didn’t look happy. Especially one guy with long blonde hair, and a girl with hair dyed purple, if I remember right they were among the first people who had managed to pass.

I suppose it could be frustrating to see someone breeze past something that you barely got through by the skin of your teeth.

I’d been observing all the fights pretty carefully, but since they’d all been so one-sided, I didn’t really learn much.

But the last fight, not only was it informative, but it also had gotten my blood pumping, despite the fact that it barely lasted ten seconds.

I could feel myself getting restless, I wanted my turn already!

Thankfully, I didn’t have long to wait. After applicant sixty-eight failed in an instant, applicant sixty-nine was me.

First of all, nice.

And secondly, it was finally my turn! Of the sixty-eight people who went before me, only a quarter of them had passed. I liked those odds. I drew my dagger, and got into position, as Admin Dile began the countdown. Let’s find out just how strong I am.

“Three, two, one.”

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Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Don’t forget to vote, and feel free to leave a comment, I appreciate any and all feedback and criticism! Also, check out my Instagram account @aimdaqs for posts relating to this book. 


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