Go to Hell, White Lotus Novel

Chapter 15 - Lotus Continues to Laugh at the Spring Breeze


[15. Lotus Continues to Laugh at the Spring Breeze] 

[Private chat] Great God: …

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: …

[Private chat] Great God: In fact, this profession is not bad

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: Not bad your head! [bangs on table crying]

[Private chat] Great God: The official website updated. You should see it for yourself

Ever since his heart was broken by the forum post pinned on the official website, Bai Lian Hua had rarely visited the site. Yesterday the old man [Shenzhou Goddess] also said that the information would be updated today. At that time, he had planned to check but he had forgotten all about it…..Bai Lian Hua sadly thought, no doubt, pulling all-nighters can affect your intelligence!

Opening the official website and ignoring the word “forum” on the top navigation bar, Bai Lian Hua clicked onto “Profession Introduction”. Sure enough, at the very end were two pictures glowing golden yellow. He couldn’t read the two words above it and could only make out the word below the cards: Monk.

After selecting the profession introduction for “Monk”, the first line of words assaulted him: this profession was successfully unlocked by the player [White Lotus] on July 12, 2013 2:31:24.

Without even needing to think about it, he could already picture in his mind the chaos happening at the forums —-the f*g Bai Lian Hua and his mother*cking luck! He even unlocked a hidden profession! I really want to destroy his chrysanthemum!!!

[Basic information:]

Occupation name: [Monk]

Professional equipment: [Jiasha] [Monk Staff] [Rosary] (Initial Equipment)

Professional skills: Unknown (Recorded in: [Buddhist Scriptures])

Professional Sect: Great Leiyin Temple

Number of players in the Great Leiyin Temple : 1

Sect number: Infinity

[Profession Introduction:]

Body is like the Bodhi tree and the heart is like the vanity table. Always diligently clean and without a mess. Bodhi originally has no trees, and the vanity mirror originally did not have a stand. From nothing to something, from dust to gold.

They are the messengers of the heavenly beings [White Lotus remarks: Just say directly that it’s birds with broken wings!]

They are the embodiment of love and justice [White Lotus remarks: Yes, hahaha! I am Musashi Kojiro!]

They are steady and diligent [White Lotus remarks: This is definitely not me!]

A/N: I can’t write anymore, please forgive me (KKNotes: Yes, this was actually in the raw)

– Technical Department: Li Shenzhou [White Lotus remarks: You f*cking waste! Why is a science department guy pretending to be all literay?!]

[Profession characteristics:]

1. Killing the monk increases the value of sin by one hundred. It will render players to be pursued by the city and hunted down. The player will be chased and attacked until they are put into jail.

2. Forever not to find a partner, and to live without gender.

3. The title of the [Monk] in the username is not replaceable.

4. Can be promoted.

The first few of these were not too difficult to understand. But what does it mean by promotion?! Bai Lian Hua was very puzzled. He switched to the game interface, opened the friends list and poked Great God.

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: Great God! What is promotion?

[Private chat] Great God: I only heard that pets can be promoted

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: ???

[Private chat] Great God: For example, the pet of Hundred Days Red: Nine Day Dragon, after reaching a certain experience level, it can be promoted to Xiao Long.

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: …

[Private chat] Great God: Maybe you can promoted to Zen Master

[Private chat] [Ancestral] White Lotus: Your cold joke is not funny OTZ

[Private chat] Great God: What professional skills do you have?

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: Let’s see…

After a few seconds….

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: Reporting to the Great God! Not a single one!!

[Private chat] Great God: …

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: You wait. I will flip through the Buddhist Scriptures.

Official website said Professional skills: unknown (Recorded in: [Buddha Scriptures]). Yesterday, he did seem to recall that bald eagle giving him such a book….Bai Lian Hua, you are now also a bald eagle! And its for life!  A bald eagle who can’t even wear wigs!

Bai Lian Hua opened the inventory, left clicked on the Buddhist Scriptures and saw there are two options: 1. [Enlightenment] 2. [Open]. Bai Lian Hua hesitated for a few seconds on Enlightenment and on Open, and chose the latter.

[System Tip: You opened [Buddhist Script] and received a pair of [Jingzhen Abbot’s Socks]]

… Bai Lian Hua wanted to curse. Jingzhen Abbot, are you the kind of bastard who puts your socks in the Buddhist scriptures?! Are you sure you’re really an abbot and not just a lazy old man?!!

With a face filled with black lines, Bai lian Hua selected the item [Jingzhen Abbot’s Socks] ready to destroy it. Unexpectedly, there were another two choices: 1. [Open] 2. [Destroy]. Curiosity killed the cat and can also kill a good young man. Bai Lian Hua clicked open.

[System prompt: You received the [Smelly] attack, you have died]

Bai Lian Hua went all SPARTA! Men in the game technology department!! Is it really okay for you to much around like this?! This is really…unforgivable!!!

He tearfully used a resurrection scroll and once again opened the inventory to see that [Jingzhen Abbot’s Socks] had disappeared.

Helpless, Bai Lian Hua once again selected the scriptures, right clicked, and then selected [Open].

[System Tip: You have reached the limit of the number of times you can open the scripture today].

Upper limit your mum!! Men in the game technology department you are really showing me your lower limits!! Dammit ahhhhh!! Bai Lian Hua angrily closed the inventory and internally wanted to smash his keyboard. But in fact, he really did smash it.

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: m,, zxm, zmzxmz, .zl.sZzsxxdaklsjlask sdfa deceled drsakoa ¥%

[Private chat] Great God: What is that

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: This poor thing in need of love is crying aslkdwkljkeljwqrlussad so pitiful agdslgng

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: … 4 # ¥ 908 hjvj,bj

[Private chat ] Great God:?

[Private chat] [Monk] White Lotus: Sorry great God! I was just cleaning the keyboard…OTZ! /Hits wall

[Private chat] Great God: En

Bai Lian Hua couldn’t understand the meaning of Great God’s comment and proceeded to open the Buddhist scriptures once again. This time he selected “Enlighten”.

[System prompt: You have been enlightened by the Buddhist scriptures. Holiness +5]

Once it was selected again: [System prompt: The number of times you can be enlightened by the Buddhist scriptures has reached the upper limit]

Bai Lian Hua could feel a volcano erupting at the top of his head. Without any restraint, he kicked his computer case.

The system let out a soft “beeep———-“, suddenly stopped and then….the screen turned black.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! His mother!!!!!!!!! The computer won’t turn on!!!!!!!!


Use the arrow keys (or A/D) for NEXT/BACK chapter.

 Comment