“So, what are we gonna do now that the exams are over?”

Kairen said while putting a spoon full of ice cream in his mouth. The three of them were sitting on a bench in the yard after their exams, eating ice cream.

“I know that there is a one-week rest, but what after that?”

“We are in our last year so we have to spend the next two months on gaining experience.”

“Gaining experience?”

“Right. We won’t take any final exams this term but our records in these two months will determine our rank.”

“….”

Kairen didn’t understand anything from Reyan’s answers and Serria who was playing with cats didn’t seem like she would answer so Kairen looked back at Reyan again with a questioning gaze.

“You know what cadets do after graduating from here, right?”

“No.”

“Pfft.”

Reyan glared at a laughing Serria and continued.

“Before graduating people normally send their application forms to the places they want to work. That includes police, military, private companies, different hunter guilds, and so on. Depending on your performance and marks, you have the chance of being hired.”

“Ooh!”

“And the last and one of the most important factors in getting the job you want is this experience-gaining program.”

“Ooh!”

“Every year, any kind of different companies and organizations observe cadets’ performance carefully so that they could hire the most talented ones. And cadets also try to do their best for their future.”

“Ooh!”

“In this period of time, cadets do different missions. They gain points depending on their performance in various situations.”

“Ooh!”

“Stop going ooh ooh please!”

“OO- Ahem, sorry! So this is to get our future job.”

“Right.”

Job… to have a proper job was one of Kairen’s dreams! Kairen shook his head. It wasn’t important what he wanted, what mattered was what that damn Kairen 1 wanted! He had to follow what that guy was doing if he wanted to find his answers.

“So did I send an application form as well?”

“Of course! The Three of us sent our files to…”

Reyan paused. Serria who was patting two cats at the same time also paused.

‘Huh?’

“…to?”

“To The Special Military Forces…”

“….”

Kairen also paused.

“…”

“…”

“…”

Serria was the one who broke the silence.

“H-how are you going to pass their exams now? What are we gonna do?”

‘No no no no, that isn’t what is important now! Why there? How? That place is scary!’

Kairen didn’t have a good image of that place in his mind thanks to professor Exell! He never imagined that he would work there! Why would that crazy Kairen 1 even want to work there?

“Is it even possible to get employed in such an organization that easily?”

“That easily? We were able to send our application forms only because we were the top students! And had to pass a bunch of entrance exams after that and a few of the exams still remain! And even if we get employed we still have to pass their training course! They are REALLY strict! OMG, why didn’t I think about it sooner! The exam was the only thing on my mind!”

Serria was pressing the two poor cats by her hands while yelling and saying those. Reyan sighed while rubbing his forehead with his hand. Kairen was cursing Kairen 1 in his head, using all sorts of curse words he had learned in his 23 years of life.

“We don’t have time to sit around, you should practice! We can’t cheat on this one no matter what!”

Serria finally let go of the cats and stood up. The cats came under Kairen’s feet, licking the melted ice cream that he placed in front of them.

‘I don’t want to practice! Let me rest!’

“What happens if I fail? Haven’t I sent application forms anywhere else?”

“Are you crazy? You know how much they pay?”

“… how much?”

“A lot!”

“Too much!”

Reyan and Serria answered at the same time.

‘Oh thank you for your detailed explanation.’

“They say with your salary; you can buy an extra-large house in only 6 months!”

“And there are lots of special privileges given to you by working there!”

“And you can take as many days off as you want as long as you do your missions properly!”

“You are even given the opportunity to meet with experts and improve your skills!”

Oh… isn’t that too much? It even felt like a scam.

“But… why would they pay so much and give that many privileges?”

Serria tilted her head in his question.

“Hmm? Well, cause the job is considered kinda dangerous.”

“….”

Kinda dangerous? Kairen looked at Reyan as he added on.

“Yeah. That’s why they are really strict in employing new force. Because if you are not skilled enough, you will just die in your first mission.”

“…”

Die? Wasn’t it too much? He wanted to go back home, not die! Kairen stood up and took a few steps back while smiling awkwardly. He didn’t want that kind of job.

“…I- I don’t need that much money you know… I don’t really need a big house and privileges…”

Right! A proper job or whatever, he didn’t want to die! He could only barely pass the exam by cheating! How is he going to work in Special Military Forces?

‘No that’s impossible!’

“…”

Serria hit Reyan’s side with her elbow.

“You scared him! What’s with those words?”

“I- I just wanted him to know!”

“That much wasn’t necessary!”

‘No Reyan, thank you for opening my eyes!’

Now that he thought about it, even taking the exam was dangerous. He saw what Reyan did in his exam! he would die! He would certainly die if he was hit like that!

“Come on, don’t be afraid! Nothing will happen to you if you are strong enough.”

“That’s right.”

‘These guys want me to get myself killed!’

Kairen took more steps back. Then turned around and headed back to his room.

“Hey hey stop. let’s talk!”

“Kairen!”

Kairen ignored them as he continued walking.

‘There is no way I’m doing that!’

****

“Are you really sure about it?”

It was Reyan who asked that while sitting on the sofa in their room. Kairen, lying on his bed, answered without even looking at him.

“Yes.”

“But… you will regret it later…”

“I won’t”

From the moment Kairen left his two friends saying that he didn’t even want to take the exams, they had been trying to change his mind. Specially Reyan who had to hear a scolding from Serria for scaring Kairen. Kairen felt sorry for him but still didn’t change his mind.

Just what was SMF? It was an organization working under the military and government. They had different units and did different missions. The organization was known as the one that did the most part in protecting Hainston and its peace from all kinds of dangers. It was like a core in the defense wall of this country.

That place was too dangerous for him!

“Think properly. You have lost your memories right now, but when you remember them again, will you be happy about what you did now?”

“I don’t care about that! I would die! Really seriously die even if I just get slapped!”

“Come on, you are not that weak!”

“You are underestimating how weak I am!”

Reyan sighed and scratched his forehead with his hand. He opened his mouth again but Kairen interrupted before he said anything.

“Don’t try persuading me. There is no reason for me to work in such a place.”

“…”

Reyan looked at him then looked away. He was contemplating whether to tell what was in his mind or not. His friend was about to throw away everything he had tried so hard to reach. Reyan felt like he had to stop him, if not he wouldn’t be able to face his friend again when he got his memories back. That’s why he started to tell Kairen what he had heard from Kairen himself in the past.

“You told me something before…”

“Hmm?”

“When we were first thinking about where to send application forms, I asked you why you wanted to work at SMF.”

Kairen turned his head towards Reyan.

“You weren’t someone who would care about money or power that much. I know you since high school. That’s why I was curious about your choice.”

Reyan was suddenly talking about the past and that surprised Kairen. He listened carefully as Reyan wasn’t someone to say nonsense like Serria.

“You said that you were searching for your answers. That you felt like you would find them there. You said you wanted to use their information network… use the special privileges given to you and your power to find it.”

“….”

“You said that it was the only way that would lead to what you wanted. You also said that it was the one and only goal in your life.”

“What were those questions…?”

“I asked that as well…”

Reyan remembered that clearly because it was surprising to see his friend like that. Back then, after hearing his question, Kairen smiled and looked up at the sky. It felt as if he was recalling something on his mind as he answered him.

“‘It may seem too philosophical, but I want to know why I am here. I feel like I have to go back, but I don’t know where I belong. It’s like I know about something, but I don’t at the same time.’ …That’s what you said.”

“….”

Kairen got goosebumps! Wasn’t that more or less what he wanted to do as well? To know why he was here and to go back…

Besides, why did this dude talk so mysteriously? Even his notebook was written in a way that he couldn’t understand!

“Was my… was my mental health really alright?”

“…. Your mental health seemed much better than that of now!”

“Hey!”

‘How can you openly insult me!’

“But it was true that you had some problems back then as well. You told me you couldn’t remember your past. That’s why I thought you were trying to find your family or something like that by using SMF.”

He couldn’t remember his past… Kairen read about it in that old notebook.

“But, is it really possible to find any kind of information you want if you work in SMF?”

“I’m not sure. But as much as I know, SMF has one of the biggest information networks. So it won’t be hard to find what you want as long as it isn’t some kind of protected secret.”

You can find any information…. It was really tempting… it wasn’t like he knew of any other way to start his search…

But still, it was too risky… he was afraid of dying. He still had a few months to train but it was too short. Besides, he had to go through that experience gaining program as well… Kairen was hesitant

“I won’t pass the exam even if I want to…”

“People spend years to learn those spells that you learned in two weeks. I believe the rest won’t be that hard as well.”

“….”

Kairen kept silent and contemplated. He really didn’t have much choice. Besides all that… magic… was something he wanted to try more…

Kairen finally got up and sat on his bed. He looked down on the floor and mumbled.

“Just a little…”

“Hmm?”

“I’ll try doing what you guys say just a little bit…”

Smile.

He could see Reyan smiling at him.