A candlelit dinner sounded like the epitome of a romantic outing, doesn’t it? Perhaps a lively conversation over a magnificent meal, something real mouth-watering like lamb or some thick juicy steak.

Well, we were on a table, there was a lit candle, there was also food, but I highly doubt I’d be earning a pat on the back from Gordon Ramsay for it. No, probably a good shouting and maybe a kick in the balls from him sounds about right.

‘You call that dinner, you say? I reckon I’d have a better time eating raw sewage straight outta Chernobyl!’

Ahh, classic.

Still though, despite the less-than-satisfactory meal I prepared, the Elf-lady sitting across from me lapped it all up before I could even take in my second spoonful.

I could tell she had a slender frame. Despite what the thick, bulky shining armor may convey otherwise, there’s no hiding her size. So I’m surprised that the girl can eat.

Honestly, with the way she gobbled and chewed, you’d think she had never eaten a bowl of cereal in her life. Yet there she was, smacking her lips, her expression absolutely glowing with satisfaction as she stretched her now empty bowl out towards me.

It was through that, that I noticed her elf-ears mirrored her emotions to the bone. The smile on her lips was one of content and her ears reflected that sentiment well with an energetic twitching that went up and down like a see-saw. It kinda reminded me of a dog wagging its tail.

Shit, that’s cute.

“Perchance,” she proclaimed. “Is it no trouble at all if I ask of you for another helping of this… this… flakes of frost, as you call it?”

I pointed my spoon at the cereal box to the side. “Frosted Flakes, it says it right there on the… nevermind, help yourself to all of it if you want, but that’s your fourth helping already.”

“Mmm, indeed it is so,” she replied, her eyes widening with anticipation as the rest of the cereal clattered into her bowl. “And yet somehow I find myself unable to abstain from such simple desires. Oh, how very unbecoming of me. Please, excuse this lowly knight’s gluttony for the time being, for I do find it rare especially in recent times to even be able to indulge in the simple pleasures.”

“‘Kay, then.” I took a bite.

I’m not even going to pretend I understood all that.

Outside, through the gap in the window curtains, the rain continued to storm fiercer than ever before, reaffirming to me that taking her out of that alleyway when I did was the best damn idea I had all day.

Dinner ended with a refreshing chug of chocolate milk which she too found equally as fascinating. Have a guess how many times I had to pour it out for her before she was satisfied. I guarantee you it wasn’t just once.

That carton was supposed to last me a couple of days too. Ah well, no use crying over drank milk.

Once I was sure she was both well and at ease with herself, I finally sprung the question I’ve been dying to know the answer to all this time.

“So, just who are you exactly?”

Her ears immediately perked upwards at the question. “Ah, just where are my manners? Forgive me. You’ve provided both food and shelter and yet I’ve never given you my name.”

“It’s not a big deal, really -”

“Hush now – say no more, simply know that I’m greatly indebted to you and that I intend to repay you in kind someday.”

A wide cheerful smile spread across her chocolate-coated lips, an expression I never expected given her stern demeanor, yet a welcomed expression nonetheless.

I nodded my head. “So, uh… name?”

“Yes, yes, of course,” She cleared her throat. “My name is Eshwlyn of the Old Guard. Former Knightess to the late King Ardvair and Sworn Seeker of the Lazarus Stone.”

‘Course long titles are a given. Frankly, I’d be upset if she didn’t have one.

“So Eshnynn, uhh, sorry, – Eshlin… Eshween?”

“Eshwlyn of the Old Guard. Former Knightess to the late King Ardvair and Sworned Seeker of the -”

“We’ll just call you Ash.”

She bowed her head. “Ash it is, then.”

“So, Ash…” I shifted in my seat. “Where are you from? It’s pretty clear you aren’t from around here, are you?”

“Indeed I am not. For once, I find myself a stranger amidst a strange land. One, unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. I’ve sailed oceans, traversed continents. Nilfa, Creekwood, Frieden Rike, Molothir, and yet all paled in comparison to this land of… of…”

“This is Earth.”

“Earth, you say?” She formed a frown. “It seems memory fails me for I do not recall seeing such a name on the dozens of maps I have studied.”

The idea of this girl being from an actual fantasy world is slowly starting to become more and more feasible as the seconds go by. The thought of it ensnared my mind.

But how could that be? How is that even possible? It shouldn’t be… yet her Elf-like ears, heavy metal armor, and sword, even her mannerisms all seemed like they came out of some generic fantasy RPG.

Either that or fantasy roleplaying has reached new heights that I never even dreamed of.

“Do you remember how you got here?” I asked.

“I do not recall, try as I might.” She said, heaving a sigh. “All is but a blur to me. I recall myself saving a child from the path of a runaway carriage but that is all I can remember, unfortunately.”

Oh… she got hit by a carriage. That explains so much, actually.

“And as for you, kind sir?” She nudged her chin at me. “Does my savior have a name?”

I chuckled. “That he does. My name is -”

*Knock* *Knock*

My lips snapped shut faster than a flytrap. I felt my heart sink into my chest. That knocking… surely it must be the wind, right? Surely… surely it wasn’t them again. It couldn’t be.

“Something the matter?” said Ash, both her head and ears tilting at an angle.

*Knock* *Knock*

There it was again. This was no wind. It’s them, alright… Godamnit.

“Wait here,” I told Ash as I stood up to my feet. Begrudgingly, I made my way to the front door, reaching for the handle.

Another knock, louder and firmer this time, sounded. There was no doubt in my mind that they would have broken it down if I hadn’t finally swung the door open.

And just as I feared, what greeted my doorstep was an unwelcome visitor, grinning at me from ear to ear. A bowler hat, a black coat, and a small umbrella. This short stubby little man was the bane of my existence.

“What do you want?” I asked, scowling.

“I was in the neighborhood,” he said, his voice croaking like a toad. “Figured I stopped by and paid a visit.”

“Mission accomplished. Now leave.”

“‘Fraid I can’t do that,” he said, wedging his foot between the door before I could slam it shut. “Well not yet, anyway. You know the routine by now.”

“What?” I was left speechless at that moment, his words just took the breath right out of my lungs. “You probably made a mistake because that can’t be. I already paid everything I owed. I don’t even have electricity now because of it.”

“Well, I feel for ya. But there’s no mistake, wouldn’t be here otherwise. Interest rates went up. If you weren’t informed about it before, you are now.”

“You’re kidding me…” I felt a surge of anger flow through me. Seriously… just when I thought I was out. “How much?”

“Another grand and bossman says you’re out for good – swears on it even.”

“I don’t have that. I’m barely getting by as is. Don’t you loan sharks have anybody else to leech off of?”

“Oh we do, but I don’t make the rules here.” He mumbled, placing a cigarette in between his lips. “So, am I gonna collect tonight or are you going to make me walk out of here empty-handed?”

Could have tried many things then. Try and talk him out of it. Run away and change my address. Make up an excuse. Threaten them with the police.

But I already tried all those things before, none worked. Like a fly in a flytrap, that’s me.

“Give me a day. Tell your boss that – a day. I’ll… I’ll have the money then.”

He blew a puff of smoke and squinted at me with narrowed eyes. “So be it,” then smiled at me. “Pleasure doing business.”

I gave a reluctant nod, I pushed the door again and this time it closed for good. He was gone, the encounter had ended… but the prospect of tomorrow makes me want to shrivel up and die.

Weak knees had me leaning against the doorframe for support. My head felt like it was about to burst so I closed my eyes, took in a deep breath, and when I next opened them – Ash was staring at me from across the hallway, her bright green eyes an intense glow in the dark.

Must be an Elf thing.

“Your walls are regrettably thin,” she muttered. “I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation.”

“Got some questions, I suppose?”

“Indeed,” she nodded her head. “What are these ‘Loan Sharks’ that you spoke of? Do they share similarities with the Frosted Flakes? Can I eat them?”

“Hah – wha – no, you can’t, don’t even.”

To my surprise, she responded with a chuckle, stifling her laughter with an open palm.

“I merely jest,” she said, still retaining a small smile. “As much as my country differs from yours, cruelty is what grips our similarities together. Thievery, corruption, injustice, matters not what land your feet stand on, they never change.”

“Yeah, well… I kinda did brought it on to myself.”

“Oh? If it’s no trouble, would you care to tell your tale?” She said, beckoning me towards her. “I feel as if I may be able to repay a debt sooner than I originally thought otherwise.”

“No, no, really… it’s my own problem. You don’t have to bother… Look, I’ll deal with it -”

“Sit,” Ash said softly, a tenderness in her eyes. “I’ll listen.”

She’s a pushy one, isn’t she? Boldly marching into my bottomless pitfall of problems without even knowing what she’s getting herself into. I got a feeling that even if she did know, she’ll still jump right in.

The rain stopped pouring, the clouds began clearing, and the moon started shining.

Today has been a day of many ups and downs. Mostly downs than ups, but who’s keeping count. I’ve yet to figure out if this chivalrous, benevolent knight-elf from another world is an up or down for me.

But seeing her gentle expression glimmer under the glow of moonlight, I’d like to think that it’s an up.