1 The System is Tired

Getting stabbed in the gut by an unknown assailant and reincarnating as a system is the worst fate anyone could have. So bad that he wouldn’t wish it on his worst enemy, not even Min Cheng.

But System #151044 really had enough.

He had never met someone so frustratingly stupid, arrogant, and horny… Whose brain must have been chewed by a dog and spat out to only think of big-chested women and having sex with those women!

Not in his almost 100,000 years of being a system in the Hero Transmigrating Machine. And he met PLENTY of good contenders for the spot of #1 Most Horrible Transmigrator.

For whatever reason someone stabbed him or how much bad karma he accumulated to deserve such a fate… Can’t the gods forgive him and transmigrate him even into the body of a snail or a toad???

He can’t even commit suicide in this formless ‘body’ as a holographic screen with a robotic voice!

And most annoyingly of all, he doesn’t just have an Al text-to-speech voice. The transmigrators can also customize it to whichever voice they want. And Min Cheng chose for him to have….

…..a kawaii neko girl voice.

[But Mr. Cheng, I identify as a man. Can’t I at least have a masculine voice?] He pleaded for the nth time.

The bastard just grinned dopily, saying: “No can do, System-chan~ I like the sound of this voice, it’s very cute and cuddly! It really makes me feel like I have a lovable little sister to help me around~”

[….My name is System #151044. Please do not refer to me as ‘System-chan’]

“It’s too long for me to memorize 1-4-1-0-5…. Blah! System-chan sounds more endearing!”

[Just say that you’re a fucking weeb.]

“What’s that, System-chan?”

[Nothing.]

That’s not even the worst of it all. It’s not just these personal wrongdoings that make Min a despicable transmigrator. He is an absolute shitty protagonist!

“Ah, so we meet again– Er… System-chan, what’s the villain’s name again?”

[…..Captain John.]

“We meet again, Captain John!”

[Min Cheng, you already fought with Captain John ten times.]

“I know that! Wait, is that a lady pirate goon? Waah, she’s so pretty!!! And her assets are so big!!! Is she romanceable?”

[Min Cheng, focus on your sword fight or you’ll get your head decapitated!]

It’s not fair. Even if he does want Min Cheng to get decapitated and suffer a horrible death on at least two or three worlds, he couldn’t.

Because systems like him are rigged to make sure the transmigrator is always satisfied. Customer satisfaction comes first in the Hero Transmigrating Machine, and fairness second.

Sure, there’s the H-points system, but (and forgive the pun) what’s the point anyways? The missions are adjusted to become easier depending on the transmigrator’s level of competence.

And this includes the villains and antagonists too. A dumb transmigrator gets an even dumber villain.

That way, Min Cheng always wins, and lives with the illusion that he is worth crap even though he is worse than bubblegum stuck on someone’s shoe.

Once the Big Boss of the world is defeated, hero transmigrators are free to move on to the next dimension of their choosing. But before that, they get to lounge at a big white dome called the Hub.

The Hub is where they can see their H-points ranking. They can talk to fellow transmigrators while waiting for their next dimension to be prepared for them. Some transmigrators can get really competitive to gain the top spot of the HTM Ranking.

Min, unfortunately, is not that type of transmigrator.

He has no interest to learn more about the worlds he enters and study how to beat them. He has no interest to improve himself as a protagonist. He has no interest to be a decent transmigator at all and not make System #151044’s life a living hell!!!!

What he’s interested in is big melons, and how to get big melons. He’s satisfied with spending all his points to get a 3-4 harem on every world. And he’s damn proud about it!

“What world did you get into, Lucien?” Asked a fellow transmigrator to the other.

Their names were floating in white letters atop their heads. One was from Northern France, Lucien Saint-Pierre, while the other was Japanese, Hitaro Yamaguchi. To fluent English speakers like Min Cheng and System #151044, if they spoke in their native language, all the words that come out of their mouths will be English.

To them, what they hear is the translation of what the other said in their own language without losing the intonation and cadence of their voice, as well as the context. That is how advanced the Hero Transmigrating Machine is.

“A xianxia one. I get to be the Daoist emperor with 12 concubines.” The one named Lucien answered.

He really was dressed in Han dynasty emperor garb, with long, flowing gold-and-black robes and an extravagant dragon headpiece. His tied-up hair would have reached the floor without it.

The only thing that was out of place was his modern watch, which he consistently fiddled with beneath his billowing sleeves.

“Ohhh, lucky! I got a high school psychic power user. And what about you, Min?” This Hitaro fellow asked.

He was dressed in a blue student uniform, nothing out of ordinary. But he has a blue flame aura surrounding him and glowing eyes. “Your current character is looking…. pretty plain.”

‘Yes, because it’s the default. He didn’t bother to customize it.’ System #151044 wanted to say.

“I got a steampunk detective world. I got to sleep with my co-detective, my weapon’s analyst, and the villain’s wife! We even did a 7 day-streak with all four of us!” Min Cheng said smugly, like an overbearing buffoon puffing up his chest.

System #151044 internally thought, ‘Dude, that’s just the bare minimum. These guys probably got more freaky stuff going on in their worlds than you do, don’t be so cocky.’

“Hey, guys!”

Someone interrupted, running to them with a cup of coffee. The name flashing on his head was Jackson Williams. “Did you see the ranking just now?”

“I haven’t checked it yet, that reminds me.” Lucien glanced at his watch. “My next dimension is still up for 15 minutes, might as well see if I got past the Top 30 at least.”

“Why are you so frantic, Jackson?” Hitaro asked, patting his shoulder.

“Because out of nowhere, the ranking board glitched and changed! The number 1 spot was replaced by a System #334251!”

“What???” Everyone’s mouth in the Hub hung open.

A system became the Top 1 Hero?!

——————

Seems like some people don’t read the synopsis, so here you go.

Disclaimer: This book has a villain MC, and he is pretty cold and ruthless and cares about nothing besides killing Min Cheng at the start.

However, his character will be developed, so if you’re expecting this to just be an evil MC power fantasy althroughout, you’re out of luck.

I REPEAT. IF YOU WANT AN EVIL MC WHO JUST KILLS EVERYONE AND IS JUST A PSYCHO FOR NO REASON, THIS BOOK ISN’T FOR YOU.

Don’t waste your time and go read another one to satisfy your murder fantasies.

There’s no romance though, if that is what you are dreading about.

No girl would change him or anything like that. There would a lot of violence, gore, and strong language.