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*****

GAR

Gar could smell Rika’s suddenly growing fear. Nothing had happened, so she must have thought about something she didn’t like. He just wished he knew if it was about him, or something from her past.

“Tell me,” he asked quietly. “What made you frown?”

Rika dropped her head back, her hands in her hair and Gar was jolted, his heart racing, blood pumping… she bared her throat to him. Just like that. Just put it out there, trusting him when he was so close—he’d never thought they’d get there that quickly.

Fuck, he wanted to taste it. But she was tense. Her fingers clawed into her hair, and her breathing not just heavy from the kiss, but from whatever was on her mind. He forced himself to focus, but in his mind he could see himself tracing the line from her chin, down her throat, to that little hollow between her collarbones—

“Every guy I’ve ever been with has gotten sick of me,” she said quietly, to the ceiling, suddenly unwilling to meet his eyes. “And it scares me to think I’m too broken to stop that from happening with you.”

“But… it’s not just up to you to make this work, Rika.”

Her head snapped up and she stared at him for a second. “I know that’s true,” she said, “but… I guess I never feel that way? Since I’m the screwed up one?”

He gently urged her to sit up straight again, which she did and when she faced him, he sighed.

“My life for yours, Rika, remember?” Gar whispered, tracing a thumb along her jaw. “It’s not just a nice thing to say. Giving up for someone else means doing it when it hurts. Not just when it’s fun.”

Rika sighed and put a hand to his face. “You’re so… perfect.”

Gar huffed a laugh. “Um, no.”

“I mean, I know you’re not perfect. But that kind of reaction… it’s too perfect, Gar. I know you mean it. I can see it from the ways you talk about other people and the things you’ve done. But it just… you seem too good to be true.”

Gar frowned. “Would you rather I pretended I wasn’t in with both feet? Because, trust me, I can lie.”

She smiled then, though it was sad. They were staring at each other and he wondered if he could kiss her again, was just about to ask when he caught the sound of many footsteps outside, and the murmur of voices. He turned towards the sound, his heart dipping into his stomach. They were going to be interrupted, and he was likely going to be told that he needed to do something, and… he didn’t want to leave her.

“Rika,” he said carefully.

“What’s wrong?”

“I think someone’s about to show up here. Everyone’s leaving the cave, and they’ll be able to smell that we came here. So I’m just warning you in case—”

Rika swung her legs around and leaped off his lap like someone had lit a fire under her. He didn’t know whether to laugh or growl that she was so scared to be close to him in front of other people. But there wasn’t time to give it any further thought, because a knock sounded at his door, but the door opened immediately, washing in the scent of Aaryn.

“Gar?” the door swung wide slowly as Gar got to his feet, praying his leathers would subtly contain the residual arousal he still felt from being so close to Rika.

“Yeah?” he growled as Aaryn entered, looking around until he saw them both, standing next to the couch.

Gar trusted Aaryn more than he trusted his blood family most of the time. But what he hadn’t counted on was the way his body reacted when Aaryn’s eyes fell on Rika.

A growl began in his throat and he stepped forward before he’d even thought, Rika startling and stepping back, away from him.

Gar swallowed the growl back, and shook his head, casting a look at Rika to reassure her, clenching his hands to fists because he was so tense, and instinctively he didn’t want another male near his mate just now, when she was feeling so fragile and vulnerable.

“I’m sorry,” Aaryn said, empathy painted all over his face.

Of course. He’d accepted the bond with Elreth years before she had. How had the male walked around without fighting every male who so much as sniffed at her?

“It’s okay, what’s going on?” Gar rumbled.

Aaryn nodded once at Rika, who gave him a hesitant smile, then turned back to Gar. “Elreth was serious about walking the Rite tonight. We have to get the disformed prepared. Right now.”

Gar swore and Rika rubbed her arm where her hair was standing up, suddenly. He was going to have to be more careful when she was still feeling so jumpy.

“I’m not leaving my mate alone,” he growled. “Not right now.”

“I’ll be fine,” Rika said, but the thread of fear that immediately twisted into her scent made her a liar.

Aaryn caught it too. He frowned and nodded. “You’re right, you’re right. What about if—”

“I’ll stay!” His mother walked in, smiling brightly, though there were lines of tension around her eyes. “I was coming to see how Rika was doing anyway.”

“You can’t miss the Rite, Mom,” Gar said flatly.

“I won’t. When you guys head through the City, I’ll come with you. Rika’s a big girl, and she’s proven herself. She’s not going anywhere—besides, being human I’m guessing she’s not too excited about the idea of attending a naked rite,” Elia said with a wink.

“I’m sorry… did you say… naked?” Rika said faintly.

Elia chuckled. “Trust me. You do get used to it… eventually.”

Gar sighed. His mother was right. And Rika was too tense to head out into danger by herself, he knew. But it also meant that he had to go. He didn’t want to leave Rika yet. And he especially didn’t want to say goodbye to her in front of his mother.

“Hey, Aaryn, can I talk to you over at our tree for just a second before you guys leave, though? It’ll only take a second.”

Gar didn’t miss his mother’s wink as they both walked out, and she shut the door behind them. Then he turned to face Rika and found her looking… deflated.

“Are you going to be okay? I don’t want to leave you,” he admitted. “I’m afraid I’ll come back and you’ll be scared of me again.”

Rika sighed. “I think the shock has mostly passed. And… and I need to get used to this, right? New culture, new set of rules. Just… go slowly when you get back.”

He nodded then went quiet when she didn’t say anything else.

It was a risk to step up close, but he moved slowly to give her time to back away if she wanted to.

Gar was really, really grateful when she didn’t. And as he kissed her goodbye, he prayed the day would come when neither of them would ever have to think about her past, or fear it.

He prayed the day would come when her eyes only ever lit with happiness to see him, not fear.