In terms of power and experience, Bai Ye was one of the most senior at Mount Hua, and I was one of the most looked down upon because of my weak spiritual root. In terms of physical appearances … well, Bai Ye was the most handsome man I had ever seen in my life, and I was plain-looking at my best. Being his only disciple was both a blessing and a curse: a blessing because it was an opportunity everyone dreamed of, and a curse because the unfitting match brought upon me everyone’s jealousy and hatred.

I was practicing swords with Lu Ying one day when I was fifteen. Swordsmanship had always been my weakness, and she beat me within a few moves, disarming my sword from my hand. I yielded, bending down to pick up my blade from the ground, but Lu Ying didn’t stop the match like she was supposed to. She lifted her sword and pointed its tip at my face.

“How did you manage to steal the favor of Master Bai Ye?” she asked. Her face was twisted in a kind of rage I didn’t understand. “You have no beauty, no talent, no powerful family behind you, nothing. How did you do it? Used a spell to seduce him?”

The word “seduce” roared in my ears like thunder. “I didn’t!” was the first thing that came out of my mouth without thoughts.

“You deny too fast, which means you’re lying,” Lu Ying snarled. The tip of her sword moved closer to my face. “Tell me what you did, otherwise my grip might be unsteady, and my sword might leave ugly scars all over your face. Although that won’t be too much of a loss to you, considering how boring you look already.”

I didn’t answer. Seeing my reluctance to cooperate, Lu Ying moved her sword to point in front of my eyes. “Maybe it’ll be more interesting to blind you. I bet Master Bai Ye won’t have much use for a blind disciple, what do you think?”

I shivered, but I didn’t want to bend and beg for her mercy. I inched backward on the ground, trying to create more distance between us. I had forgotten there was a cliff behind me.

Lu Ying stepped forward as I moved back, and when I finally realized her plan, it was too late. My hands lost purchase over the edge, and with a scream, I fell.

I thought death was coming for me. But instead of falling onto the hard rocks at the bottom of the cliff, I fell into a soft embrace. It was warm, filled with the familiar scent of cedar. I opened my eyes and found myself staring right into Bai Ye’s beautiful, dark pupils.

His look was mixed with worry and anger, but most of all there was a gentleness, a kind, reassuring look that told me, it’s alright, everything will be fine.

The moment I looked into those eyes, all my fear and hurt vanished, and all I wanted in the whole world was to stay in his embrace.

I didn’t know how Bai Ye got Lu Ying to confess afterward, though she did, and I never saw her again at Mount Hua. But I could never forget the words she said: “How did you do it? Used a spell to seduce him?”

It wasn’t until then that I realized how much I wished for such a spell. To cross the line of a master and disciple relationship was forbidden, but I couldn’t control the thought growing in my mind. My heart raced every time I saw him, and I savored every moment when he held my hands to correct my sword moves. Sometimes in my wildest dreams, when I found myself free from all the rules, I would even …

The thought burned me, and I snapped out of my memories. Bai Ye was watching me with a half-smile, my newly bandaged hand in his lap.

“What were you thinking?” he asked.

I shrank my hand back. “Nothing,” I lied and fled to the medicine pot. My cheeks were hot, and it wasn’t from stirring the boiling pot.

“You’ll need more licorice next time,” Bai Ye paced behind me and pointed at the medicine. “There are too many strong herbs in your ingredients. It’ll make a very potent dose, but it’ll be hard on the patient’s body. Licorice can neutralize the strength and lessen the adverse effects.”

“Is it too late to add it now?” I asked, afraid of the consequences if the answer was yes.

“Don’t worry about it. The proportions you’re using right now are passable. Chu Xi might get an upset stomach from it, nothing more. It might just teach her a lesson about making everyone else do things for her for free.”

I opened my mouth to argue, but Bai Ye gestured for me to stay quiet. “Now, time to apply your spiritual power to the potion. Show me your improvement.”

This was the moment I dreaded. spiritual power was what made the difference between common medicine and immortal medicine. I could use all the best ingredients, boil it on the perfect heat level, but the result wouldn’t be any better than a common healer’s creation unless I add spiritual power to it.

And my spiritual power was weak. Although Bai Ye never showed me anything but encouragement, I could imagine how disappointed he was by a disciple whose spiritual power never grew, no matter how much effort he put into my training.

I held my hand over the pot and called my power forward. A purple light danced on the surface of the liquid, then quickly dissolved into the medicine. The pot bubbled, and the smell of medicine in the room thickened slightly.

“No improvement,” I said guiltily. It was better to acknowledge it myself before Bai Ye pointed it out.

“I counted up to ten this time,” he said, “instead of nine, before your spiritual power was fully absorbed. That means it’s getting stronger. Don’t ignore small progress like this, Qing-er. It all builds up.”

I stared at him. He was keeping counts every time I did this? Just so that he could find all my tiny achievements and encourage me?

“Keep it up,” he smiled. “You’ll do very well with time.”

I nodded and said silently to myself: yes, Master.. I will never fail you.