The moment I breathed the air outside instantly something about it just hit me different. 

Thunderstorm had pretty much turned the entire front of the house into a cluttered, wet mess that even a full day’s raking and scorching sun shining wouldn’t solve – but that’s not what was different about it. 

Maybe it was the lack of ignorance, knowing what I know now, being made aware of what encircled my childhood home all these years, but the surroundings felt… lighter, somehow more tranquil in a way… even with the rain still drizzling down from the porch roof. 

“You really did take it down, huh?” Sammy remarked, keeping me steady again down the rickety steps. “I don’t know how impressive that is in terms of magical feats but if it really was Mom that placed it herself, and considering what she is… that’s gotta be pretty impressive, right?” 

“Mmm… maybe, I guess,” I murmured, too invested just trying not to trip on my feet to care at the moment. “But next time she ever wants to put something up around the house again – tell her to just build a fence.” 

It was a long, slow, and absolutely agonizing walk to the barn that I really wasn’t looking forward to, but as excruciating as it’ll be, waiting was even more so. 

The cold howl of the wind and the patter of light rain accompanied us on our stroll through the muddy dirt, and with every step forward, Sammy’s sighs grew louder and more frequent, almost as frequent as my grunting at that. 

“Amanda’s not calling,” She muttered at one point out of the blue. “Five-ten minute intervals. It’s been fifteen, already. That’s strange of her.”

“Probably sleeping,” I suggested, my eyes steadily focusing on that large looming building growing closer in the distance. “Worried herself to slumber. Let her sleep, no doubt she needs it.” 

“She said you promised you’d call her back.” 

“I will, I want to, as soon as I’m done,” I said. “Not done just yet.” 

“And you also promised me dinner too…” 

I paused for a moment. “I fainted.” 

“Excuses,” She retorted, shaking her head in an overt display of cold disappointment. “You suck at keeping promises.” 

Honestly, compared to what I’ve gone through as of late, slander was a nice change of pace, really… just a nice breath of fresh air. 

Speaking of air… once again, there was just something peculiar about it. Here, drawing closer and closer to the barn’s entrance, it felt distinctly different. I could just sense it – darkness, a bleakness, an invisible cloud of negativity swirling, permeating… denser, thicker… with every inch closer, the most unsettlingly thing was that it also felt strongly familiar, as it should… because of course, it reminded me of me.

And just who else in this whole wide vastness of the universe could remind me of me? Take a lucky guess, I guarantee you won’t be wrong…

“I’m regretting this…” the suddenly timid blur beside me whispered. “Besides, with what’s about to happen, is this really the perfect time?” 

“Then when will it be ever?” I asked her. “I’m not telling you to forgive her. But if you really want to go back now, I won’t stop you.”

She looked up at me, throwing me an annoyed look that I couldn’t see. “And if I stay – then what? What do I even need to be here for?” 

“That’s up to you, Sammy, not me,” I said, taking the first steps forward. “But if you really can’t figure out a reason to be here, then you can just tell yourself you’re only here just to keep an eye on me. That works for you, right?” 

For quite some time, behind me, I heard only a long silence, before eventually, faintly, footsteps stamped out that quiet, trailing closely along after me. 

There you go, Sammy.

The barn wasn’t bolted shut like it was every other night. A simple tug, and both doors slowly swung open, and then… and then… y’know, I thought it was a little peculiar how distractingly silent it was outside the premises… no ambiance, not even a single creak… now I wish I could have properly appreciated that quiet when I had…

Beastly. That harsh, screeching scream piercing through the night the moment I parted the doors open, then came the crashing, the shuffling, the sounds of objects being tossed and hurled about – yet all beyond deafened but one frantic demand. 

“KILL ME!” 

Harry was up on his feet and pressing himself backed against a wall, his usual kind, mild-mannered expressions grotesquely contorted by blind rage that even I could see, the ground around him a mess of scattered silverware, spoilt food, and tools. A gleaming silver tray came hurtling towards me only to land inches away in another deafening clatter. 

“THAT’S ALL YOU KNOW TO DO, DON’T YOU?!” He shouted, his scratchy voice resounding in a coarse echo. “SO DO IT! SPARE US BOTH THE HASSLE!” 

Harry had his wide, wild stare permanently affixed to something, to someone – a figure in dark standing a short distance away, and I felt it again, that presence, that sight… that reminder of me… and yet at the same time, it felt so different. 

Mom looked different. 

I guess we barged in the middle of something.

Clad in a pitch-black that was even darker than the darkness itself. I recognized it almost immediately. I’ve seen that same blackness covering every inch of her before… in an old memory from a long, long time ago… from someone else… someone far older than I – Ria’s.

That gown – almost slithering, almost alive, it’s dark furled edges gliding across the ground as she began to slowly pace about. 

“Once again, I’d appreciate it if you would lower your tone when speaking,” sounded her voice, contrasting his, ever as gentle and calm as can be. “Loud noises… it tends to be quite a bother to me, you see.”

He breathed out in a growl, hurling a fork directly at her which suddenly veered away in a completely different direction. 

“Bitch…”

“And mind your tongue, please,” Mom said sharply, her gaze slightly tilting backwards. “I don’t appreciate that language, especially when my daughter is around to hear it.” 

Suddenly, it was as if Harry had been gagged. In an instant – silence. No longer growling or shouting, like he’s lips has been forcibly sealed shut.

Beside me, I heard Sammy hold her breath. I could feel her body tensing. A million questions probably already running a thousand laps in her head by the time she even breathed out again. 

Taking advantage of her silence, Mom did a quick turn, facing us fully with her usual sweet smile and on a face paler than white.

“Curiosity, hm?” She said, leaning her head at an angle. “Wondering what dear ol’ Mom could be up to? Should have known erecting a silencing ward around was a waste…”

Sammy maintained her quiet, facing her with a glare that didn’t have any weight in it. Mom saw it, saw her, and beamed a small earnest smile.

“You’re the last person I ever expect to see now, or even ever…. I’ve missed seeing your face,” She said, and for a brief moment, she just stared. “Your eyes… trouble sleeping, hm?” 

In the corner of my eyes, Sammy dropped her head. “Yeah…” 

Mom gave a sigh, her smile fading slightly.

“I’m sorry.” 

Then quickly, her gaze drifted, slowly meeting mine.

“Speaking of which, you should still be asleep,” Mom said, and there, I noticed her black eyes exuding a darkness that I’ve never seen before. “Getting more and more rebellious by the second, aren’t you?” 

A familiar darkness.

“It’s as if you don’t even trust me anymore,” She chuckled, a familiar chuckle, yet different. “Do you?”